As we continue Mentor's request to help him feed people at Petco Park with various delicious foods, we come to a bullet point that's probably not very controversial... Guacamole.
There's really no arguing this point. If you don't like guacamole, there's no sense in you telling everybody you don't like guacamole, and if you like guacamole, then you know that there is very little in terms of variation to get a good guacamole.
In fact, the only guacamole that I can think of that's unique in a good way is probably La Puerta's guacamole downtown. Otherwise, guacamole is easy:
Cook Time: 5 minutes
- Get some slightly overripe avocados
- Mash those f_ckers up
- Squeeze a bit of lime in there
- Add diced tomatoes/onions/garlic/pepper in TRACE amounts. You're not making salsa, bro.
- Salt to taste
No you absolutely do NOT add sour cream. Plenty of legit Mexican food places will add sour cream just to make their avocados last longer, but we're talking the best recipe, which leaves sour cream in a tub in the fridge. If you must have sour cream, you may have it, but put it to the side of your guacamole. Contrary to popular belief, you can add a little bit of cheese to your guacamole. I once lost a guacamole contest because I added cheese to switch up my guacamole and got made fun of for it, but those same people claim to love La Puerta's guacamole, which features cheese. So in the end, I was right.
Is there any place that does an especially good guacamole? This is really not hard to do right... like the taco.
I remember a Mexican restaurant in Charlotte that was actually pretty good. We asked for guacamole, nervous that they would bring us a bowl of green queso, and instead, our server walked up with two avocados, mashed those suckers up and added juuuust the right amounts of everything. Seriously Benihana'd us a great bowl of guacamole. Put some warm, salted tortilla chips in front of us and we were in heaven. Oh man... Such good guacamole.
So have at it. Critique my recipe, but know that guacamole is arithmetic. There's no room for guesswork if you're looking to get the right answer.
I'm a Good Eats guy
I make Alton’s all the time, but I leave out the tomatoes.
3 Haas avocados, halved, seeded and peeled
1 lime, juiced
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon cayenne
1/2 medium onion, diced
2 Roma tomatoes, seeded and diced
1 tablespoon chopped cilantro
1 clove garlic, minced
Perfect
Frozen_Pizza - January 13, 2012
mmmmm, this sounds great
Duke Street Kings - January 13, 2012
Rec'd for the 1/2 teaspoon of cumin
Most important ingredient that everyone seems to leave out.
For a real easy recipe and if you have no time:
1. 2 avacados mashed up
2. a pinch of cumin
3. pinch of salt
4. two tblspoons Pico De Gallo
Not as fancy, but if you have a party to start in 5 minutes then this is your recipe.
cubbuster - January 13, 2012
I make mine kinda the same way you do.
But I don’t mash the f_ckers up TOO much. And I put cilantro (sometimes) and a sh_t ton of lime because I love lime. And if I’m making it just for myself, I’ll dice some fresh jalapeno reeeeaaaallll tiny and mix it in because I like that sh_t spicy.
jodes0405 - January 13, 2012
Btw, I made some yesterday because that first food thread and all the guacamole- and avocado-haters made me want it.
jodes0405 - January 13, 2012
Everything she just said.
But when I dice my tomatoes up (super fine-like), I put them in a couple of paper towels to blot out the excess juice so the final product doesn’t get all runny.
TheThinGwynn - January 13, 2012
Cilantro is best. But usually sprinkle on leaves after taco is complete because it looks pretty as garnish too.
Lime in copious ammount.
Well played girl.
soulSD - January 13, 2012
Same exact thing
John Gennaro - January 13, 2012
I don't like Guacamole much. So I make my own frequently.
3-5 Avacados perfectly ripe, Sliced into cubes.
2 Roma Sized Tomatoes cubed and seeded
4 sprigs of cilantro
1 Juice of lime
Salt
Pepper
I like to add 1 chopped jalapeno, and if I am feeling frisky, 1 chopped chipotle.
Mix with hands real gently to preserve the texture of the cubed avacados.
Result: chunky guacamole with a salty zing with a refreshing cilantro finish. Perfect with some chips.
MrDanielX - January 13, 2012
Avacados are the devils fruit
As are tomatoes.
Please don’t ban me.
EnglishChris - January 13, 2012
I think we should give him a break
He is British, all they like their is Cheese and Radishes. #WallaceAndGromited
MrDanielX - January 13, 2012
*there
MrDanielX - January 13, 2012
Not even the occasional boiled tomato?
Mooshed onto burnt toast with baked beans on the side? That’s not appetizing?
Dex - January 13, 2012
Cooked tomatoes are OK
raw ones I think it’s a texture thing
EnglishChris - January 13, 2012
1 Habanero pepper
1 yellow pepper
1 red jalapeno pepper
1//2 yellow onion
1 bunch green onions
1/2 bunch cilantro
4 roma tomatoes
3 heirloom tomatoes
Puree the Heirloom tomatoes with the peppers
Chop the onions, cilantro and roma tomatoes
Combine —If too dry or too hot add one more Heirloom tomato
Mix 30/70 with mashed up avocados / squeeze in a little lemon / add salt
field39 - January 13, 2012
Sounds like my kind of guacamole
Although I don’t know about the green onions
Antonio Olivares - January 13, 2012
it's a secret
derntootin - January 13, 2012
Pepper
plenty of pepper, and different types. You know what I’m talking about Dex!
Jonny Dub - January 13, 2012
So gross
Dex - January 13, 2012
Dude
You even put a ton of pepper your home brew.
jbox - January 13, 2012
Guac Contest
Years ago, down at the beach we had a Guac contest. People voted, including those just passing by. Guess who won? Pepper Baby!
Jonny Dub - January 13, 2012
No goddamn tomato or onion. That crap is filler.
Some microplaned garlic (if there are chunks of garlic, you’re doing it wrong), finely minced jalapeno, cilantro, salt, lime juice. But if your guacamole is less than 95% avocado, you have done it wrong. Also, it should be chunky! If you randomly shove a fork into the bowl, you should pull out a chunk of avocado. Otherwise, you have made avocado dip.
Darklighter - January 13, 2012
I think "lumpy" is a better adjective for how I like mine
kevintheoman - January 13, 2012
My wife's is pretty much the best
I won’t give out all her secrets but for straight Guac and Chips she adds some grated cheddar in there. When she takes it to a party and there are other guacs there, her bowl is always eaten first.
fairweather - January 13, 2012
This sounds worse than it is
But that’s who I learned the cheese thing from.
Dex - January 13, 2012
" her bowl is always eaten first"
I’ve heard about those kind of parties…
Hormel - January 13, 2012
I am a guacamole slut
Because I think I would love all of your guacamole recipes. I’d even eat the stuff with sour cream in it, because that’s how my mom did it when I was a kid. Pretty much all I require is mass quantity of avocado. It’s really hard to mess up guac.
Don’t talk to me about mayonnaise, though. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten guac with mayo in it, but just knowing it exists on this planet makes me uneasy.
scout1222 - January 13, 2012
I dont think you can be a guacamole slut...too many people love it.
That’s like saying you like sex. It’s only the weirdos who don’t like it.
BryanHarvey'sMoustache - January 14, 2012
How is this stupidity not a fanshot
Nardfather - January 13, 2012
It got frontpaged because Dex is a big contributor to this blog.
TheThinGwynn - January 13, 2012
also its nothing to do with fanposts or fanshots
but research purposes for Mentor on improving food choices at Petco. (or at least related to it) Besides whats the big deal of it being front paged? Theres still room to talk about baseball stuff -What little of it there is right now. Theres like 3 threads related to Moorad/Moores transfer or lack thereof, and there hasn’t been a trade in over a week,(uh oh..looks like we’re due for another one) so…might as well talk about this!
Nater Tater - January 13, 2012
Yep
Tomorrow is trading day. Moorad might start rage-dealing. Headley better watch his back.
Friar Fever - January 13, 2012
Trading Day
sounds like a Denzel Washington movie
Nater Tater - January 13, 2012
What a day. What a motherf*cking day...
Friar Fever - January 13, 2012
some of this guac
might give me the fanshats
Hormel - January 13, 2012
It is not a link
nor a quote, image, video, list, or chat.
jodes0405 - January 13, 2012
guacamole purist
none of that mango or jicama crap, make it straight up:
avocados
lime
onions
cilantro
salt n’ peppa
those are the 5 core ingredients, period. Tomatoes optional, I can see the arguments both ways….. If you want to add a little zest with cumin, garlic, jalapenos or other peppers, cool, but get out of my face with those big chunks of red bell pepper and whatever crazy BS you think is crafty.
EitanBomb - January 13, 2012
La Posta
on the topic, La Posta in Hillcrest may have the consistently best taco shop guacamole out there. And they are not skimpy with it.
EitanBomb - January 13, 2012
I love when a taco shop just loads you up with guacamole
I hate when they load you up with the pale off-green guacamole/sour cream mix. Or if it looks like it was frozen. Ugh.
Dex - January 13, 2012
Keep it simple
One avocado
Half a habanero pepper, minced and seeded
One small garlic clove, minced
Lightly sautee the habanero and garlic in several drops each of olive oil and white wine. Spoon the sauteed pepper and garlic onto the peeled avocado and mash.
Important note: It helps if you wear surgical gloves while working with that habanero.
Blueberry Pancakes - January 14, 2012
Oh God, the f_cking habanero
Got some of that stuff in my eyes one time when cooking Cajun-style chicken. I’ll still throw it in the guac to add some extra kick, but now I treat it like uranium when I’m working with it.
I have to agree with EitanBomb above— keep it simple and don’t get crazy when you’re personalizing. One of my dad’s friends always throws ginger in his, which just doesn’t work. Garlic, peppers, and tomatoes are good building blocks.
StrangeBroP25 - January 14, 2012
That doesn't sound simple.
jodes0405 - January 14, 2012
Then just use
a packet of Lawry’s guacamole dip powder with a couple avocados. But, really, it’s worth doing a little chopping of fresh ingredients.
Blueberry Pancakes - January 15, 2012
No.
I meant having to sautee the pepper and garlic. I’m just saying, don’t call it simple if you’re going to add a cooking aspect.
jodes0405 - January 15, 2012
Yes, it is a bit odd
to use the verb “sautee” in a recipe for guacamole. But it only takes a minute or two. The pan and the stove do all the work. And the process helps the flavors to blend into the avocado more evenly.
Blueberry Pancakes - January 15, 2012
Well you do take the seeds out of the habanero.
I was under the impression that those things had to be disposed of has hazardous waste.
field39 - January 15, 2012
They are pretty damn hazardous
I’ve burned my eyes on the train on the way to work the morning after making guacamole by rubbing them with hands that had been washed any number of times. Had to wait till I got to work before I could douse them with water.
Blueberry Pancakes - January 17, 2012
I'm not saying it's a bad recipe or anything like that.
It’s just that “simple” to me means not having to use anything but a knife and maybe a spoon/fork for mashing. Chop and mix.
jodes0405 - January 15, 2012
To me simple is
in the number of ingredients. I have impressed a hell of a lot of friends with these three simple ingredients.
Blueberry Pancakes - January 17, 2012
The biggest difference always seems to be between lime or lemon....
BryanHarvey'sMoustache - January 14, 2012
no tomatoes, no onions
Mad_Villain - January 14, 2012 via Android app
Cozymel's
Totally hooked on it.
They make it at your table, FRESH, and add whatever you want.
Add lime, please.
eastbaysd - January 15, 2012
On a slightly different note-- no trades yet today?
Step it up, Byrnes.
StrangeBroP25 - January 15, 2012
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